Every Day is Marne Gras

I have to be at work in exactly five minutes. It is 6:50 am. I will be late. I am also writing this from a University computer whose ‘enter’ key doesn’t work. Whatever. Two nights ago while at a post-Salon of Shame pommes frites binge with a friend, I ran into a woman I had a one night stand with sometime this spring or summer. I forget. Not the point. Friend at I happened to be at Cafe Presse, where the tables are six inches apart, and they literally sat me almost on top of Eleanor, who I literally had to fake it to get away from six months prior. We laughed, she soon left with her ugly man date, and I proceeded to gorge on my fries, not thinking of it until yesterday, when I ran into THREE MORE people I never, ever wanted to see in public. 1. A former student of mine from the job skills training program I worked for last year. A reminder: I am currently a barista on a college campus. I realized she was my student as I was making her a chai latte. Who needs job skills now, bitch, was the general feeling I got from her. 2. The mother of the little boy I nanny ran into me while I was making drinks roughly three hours later. She looked shocked and embarassed. And yet, I was the one in the apron. I guess this is what happens when you are a fancy pants lawyer? 3. None of this really matters, because I took Nicky, the boy I nanny for, out to dinner last night. We went to a pizza place in Wallingford that I like that gives kids lots of things to play with (including pizza dough! Five year old heaven is a restaurant with pizza dough!), but I won’t be going back there because MY THERAPIST WAS OUR WAITRESS. I would be inclined to type ‘apocalyptic fail’ here if I could do so without thinking a kitten somewhere wasn’t having its ears ripped off, but I can’t, so I won’t. It was awk to the ward. I was hot and bothered and not in the good way. No literary devices. No run-ons. No jokes. I have to go to work. WILL THE UNIVERSE PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE?